Episode 32
Still Loving My Selfie, Love Thy Selfie Remastered | LAYC32
I am travelling for a month, visiting family, dear friends and colleagues in Canada, and spending some reflection time with Me, Myself and I.
I love road trips, and as a safe driver should, I frequently glance in the rearview mirror.
My attention doesn't linger there; just brief seconds to make be aware of what is behind me. But, at the same time, I see me and I have the opportunity to check in with me also.
Six months ago, I recorded the episode "Love Thy Selfie". Today, on the road, I look back as a reminder to love me first, so that I can love others as my best self.
Safe travels all!
Transcript
Will you be my Valentine?
Speaker:It's February, traditionally the month that we think about hearts
Speaker:and flowers, and candy, and dates, and a little romance...
Speaker:Spending a little more time loving on the people that are important in our lives.
Speaker:I think that we should be loving on ourselves every month.
Speaker:That's why one of my mottos is Love Thy Selfie.
Speaker:Just as a reminder...
Speaker:Particularly for many women...
Speaker:Certainly I earned that badge...
Speaker:I am often much more critical of myself than anybody else could ever be.
Speaker:I'm not good enough.
Speaker:I'm not young enough.
Speaker:I'm not slim enough.
Speaker:I'm not, not, not,
Speaker:Always this drive to...
Speaker:Be better THAN...
Speaker:Instead of going...
Speaker:This is ME...
Speaker:And this is wonderful.
Speaker:I Do Love My Selfie.
Speaker:It's such an awkward thing at first to say...
Speaker:To myself...
Speaker:I was raised with that sort of of attitude of...
Speaker:Don't be vain.
Speaker:Don't be looking for compliments..
Speaker:Always be very humble and meek.
Speaker:And you know, if you think too much of yourself, well you're really just...
Speaker:Heading for trouble.
Speaker:That you should always only be thinking about other people.
Speaker:And as a woman...
Speaker:You should put yourself last.
Speaker:you should always, kind of be...
Speaker:Demure, or at least not...
Speaker:Practicing any form of self admiration or self appreciation.
Speaker:Unfortunately, that's changing a lot.
Speaker:But of course, the other side of the coin can be...
Speaker:That now, today, with our social environment...
Speaker:Where we are being exposed to filtered and altered photographs
Speaker:of everybody's A life...
Speaker:But it becomes even more of a challenge to go...
Speaker:Oh my...
Speaker:This is me...
Speaker:Without my makeup, on a bad hair day, on a day when I'm feeling
Speaker:less than the Superwoman...
Speaker:That I want to be, or that I need to be...
Speaker:For myself, and for others.
Speaker:In a conversation with a friend of mine, not long ago.
Speaker:She's said something that's just stuck with me...
Speaker:We were talking about...
Speaker:At our age...
Speaker:We're both in our sixties plus...
Speaker:How to feel desirable and sexy and passionate...
Speaker:The disappointment in changing, and evolving relationships over time.
Speaker:Where some of that passion is lost, or we just don't feel sexy
Speaker:enough to deserve that passion.
Speaker:Her statement was...
Speaker:If I don't turn me on?...
Speaker:Who can?!!
Speaker:That struck a chord with me, and made me think more about that...
Speaker:That...
Speaker:Yes, as a woman, I'm 66 years old now.
Speaker:I don't know where you are in this spectrum of evolution as a woman...
Speaker:But...
Speaker:Can you look at yourself?...
Speaker:and say...
Speaker:Hey babe, you turn me on.
Speaker:And when you do...
Speaker:Really, really say that with conviction.
Speaker:How does that change your attitude?...
Speaker:Your feeling, your posture, your smile, your sparkle, your tingle
Speaker:in all those great feminine places?
Speaker:Has society pegged us wrong?
Speaker:Do we stop being romantic or sexy or just wanting physical affection when,
Speaker:after menopause, or in our sixties.
Speaker:I'm a grandmother who's a live, warm blooded woman.
Speaker:I want not only to be admired for who I am authentically, but to
Speaker:admire myself, for who I truly am.
Speaker:When I wonder about how you feel about this, and...
Speaker:What are the ways that we can appreciate ourselves?
Speaker:To continue to build ourselves up so that we feel great...
Speaker:And we set examples for people around us.
Speaker:Know the old adage...
Speaker:of mama's not happy, nobody's happy?
Speaker:I think that applies to how we feel.
Speaker:Absolutely.
Speaker:It does apply to how we feel about ourselves and how that radiates
Speaker:around us and affects other people.
Speaker:There's the energy, the vibes that are flowing...
Speaker:When you do feel positive about yourself.
Speaker:As a woman aging through childbearing years and menopause, and divorce
Speaker:and business challenges, and growth.
Speaker:The loss of loved ones, dear friends and parents...
Speaker:It isn't always sunshine and lollipops..Is it?...
Speaker:But...
Speaker:Then you add on to that...
Speaker:As we get a little older...
Speaker:And hair is growing where we don't want it to...
Speaker:And isn't growing, we wish it would more.
Speaker:Our bodies letting us down, changing and morphing in shape.
Speaker:Hormones are coming and going.
Speaker:Staying up late means staying up past 9:00 PM, and our energy levels can be lower,
Speaker:and our habits, and our willpower...
Speaker:They have different priorities.
Speaker:Let's just say that.
Speaker:Does that mean...
Speaker:That we aren't any less vibrant?...
Speaker:and desirable?...
Speaker:To ourselves, and for ourselves?
Speaker:I think not.
Speaker:It's a matter of changing our perspective and realizing that the societal norms
Speaker:of the curly blue haired grandma...
Speaker:The cardigan sweater and the sensible shoes are not relevant anymore.
Speaker:Unless we choose that is who we are, and that's what we love about ourselves.
Speaker:Instead...
Speaker:We have options.
Speaker:We're evolutionary women...
Speaker:We can rewrite those standards.
Speaker:And in fact, we're writing what I call Her-story.
Speaker:What does it mean now, in 2021 and beyond...
Speaker:To be a woman?
Speaker:In the 3rd stage of her life?
Speaker:What do you do?...
Speaker:How do you show up?...
Speaker:In those 50, 40, 30, 20, more years that you will live vibrantly and energetic?
Speaker:What are the ways that you identify with this new you?...
Speaker:This next you...
Speaker:How do you leverage that to influence your life, your own autonomy and satisfaction.
Speaker:How do you influence others, and be a mentor or role
Speaker:model, for those around you?
Speaker:With all of that lifetime of accumulated tacit knowledge, feminine wisdom,
Speaker:experience, strengths and skills.
Speaker:What will you do?...
Speaker:To help others, as you Lift As You Climb, and have an impact that is significant...
Speaker:and is the legacy that you create!
Speaker:Very interested to hear what your thoughts are about...
Speaker:Do you turn yourself on?
Speaker:If you don't...
